I was having vacation let down. This happens after having a really good time when I realize that I have indeed returned to normal life. Symptoms of this let down include a transformation into feeling like a slug, a discontent with activities of normal routine living and yearning to return to vacation brain mind set where the only item on the agenda is what fun things you are going to do. April was called the month o' fun which was fantastic except for the more fun experienced only exacerbates the let down process. It started yesterday. I started showing signs of it when Liv and I were still in our pajamas at 11:30 without any motivation in sight to do anything about it.
Have you ever had a day where you just feel like you are moving in slow motion and that nothing sounds fun or worthwhile? The kind of day where bed gravity is extra strong and everything seems a a ridiculous amount of effort to do? Welcome to yesterday. I could relate to this:
I ate a bowl of raisin nut bran while Liv feasted on some pureed chicken and apple mush (seriously, who thinks of the food combinations in those jars?), checked pinterest and pinned a few projects I will never do, turned on the Jillian Michaels 30 day shred and watched her work out while the only calories I burned was when I put on my exercise clothes. It was raining all day and misty gray so that sucked out any desire to be outside soaking up the non existent sun. I tried to have scripture study but mostly just stared at the pages of people destroying each other with shaven heads and loin cloths and felt slightly less than inspired and settled on a having a bowl of cinnamon life instead and continued to rot and check priceline. I put Liv down for her nap and decided that it was time for me to emerge from my sluggish abyss and take out the trash.
When I got back inside I felt like I should sweep the floor around the trash and then I saw some lemon 409 on the counter and since I like the smell, I thought I maybe would clean the counters really well and load the dishwasher. Well the kitchen looked so good that I decided to move right on the living room and vacuum. By now I was in a rhythm, I was picking up momentum and organized all of Liv's clothes that had been sitting for weeks. I threw in a load of laundry just for fun, prepared my seminary lesson, organized our room, cleaned the bathroom, started dinner and was feeling exhilarated. What the heck was happening? I had salted in the inner slug and I was on a roll. This was totally unlike me. I didn't know what was happening. It was all a productive blur. I hurried and went to the store to make a homemaker deluxe dinner and called 3 people back I should have on the way. When I got back I quickly wrote in my journal, got a package ready to send, talked to my grandma and felt like I was just getting started when G called to say he was on his way. I was frantic because I wasn't ready yet for him to come because I still had so much to do. I don't know what happened but I think it had something to do with this concept:
I think the principle of inertia is true with human beings. An object (or person) at rest will continue at rest and an object (or person) in motion will continue in motion. Sometimes I think I worry about what is the best thing to do or what to do that I don't do anything when the secret really is to just DO SOMETHING and everything else will work out.
It's so easy to keep molding and rotting inside myself when I know I want to change or do something or need to be doing something different than what I am and the catalyst to change it, really is just to start, to do something, anything because it destroys inertia and starts much more than just the thing I began. It is so true that "if you always do what you've always done, you'll always get what you've always got." I hate feeling like I have mold growing inside my soul because I've been doing the same things and being the same person without progressing for too long. Starting, doing, not intending and thinking about it, is what kills mental mold. Liv and I need personal progression inertia to work in our favor which means we have to start. Which means I'm going to stop blogging and go do some things that need doing. Anti moldy Chel signing off.
I miss your face! Love you!
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